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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 26/11/2007 : 22:26:40
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Well I'm rarin to go to Ll********ffll. There's lovely
Sorry I missed the conker trip, but I left my conkers outside soaking in vinegar and the skwerls pinched them.
I was thinkin of giving Welsh presents this year so it will be an ideal opportunity to shop.
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 17/12/2007 : 12:38:00
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You have all been invited to our annual village Christmas party this Saturday 22nd. This is an event you won't want to miss Starting at 2pm with Father Christmas arriving in the dung cart (provided by Farmer Giles of Hollybottom Farm), surrounded by elves from the Elves Presley village appreciation society, and angelic angels from the reform school down the road...we will have a short carol service before tucking in to turkey, mince pies, custard, sprouts (if required), christmas cake, pickled onions and a real yule log (supplied by Balls the woodchoppers). At 5pm dancing will commence...a 'live' band 'Wizzardslade anon' will sing festive favourites and Agadoo - the Christmas version. Tea will follow at 6pm with all sorts of goodies supplied by 'Flossie's Fancies'. At 7pm Walter will give a talk on Christmas past - 'My life as a wiseman'. For those not asleep after this - more dancing!...this time from the mobile disco 'Country sounds'. The evening will finish with the distribution of gift bags (which can double up as pooper bags when your out with the dog) Tickets are FREE ...do come along and join in the party you never thought you'd attend
Tootle |
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Carole R.
Higher and Higher
    

United Kingdom
12869 Posts |
Posted - 17/12/2007 : 15:15:02
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Well thank goodness that like the party, I'm free this coming Saturday the 22nd December at 2pm.
Mind you, I'm always free for something free, as you well know..
The Party sounds just up my alley.
There is just one thing lacking, and that is Karaoke.
I've got my heart set on duetting with Walter , I'm thinking along the lines of 'Up where we belong' ( As in Jennifer Warnes and Joe Cocker) That would be the ultimate crowd pleaser. Can you get him to learn the words?...Failing that, he could always write them all over his hands and arms.
Will Father Christmas be getting out of the dung cart? ..
I have to say that I'm not overly keen on sitting on his knee surrounded by piles of sh dung.
...However,
Please stick a ticket in the post for me Tootle, I'll be there... you can count on that.
The free as a bird, PENxx |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 17/12/2007 : 21:36:39
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Ticket has been sent. I'm afraid Walter cannot 'do' Joe Cocker, but informs me he knows all the words to 'Underneath the arches' (you can be Flannigan OR Allen as they both had fur coats)...however he is rather keen to sing 'My boomerang won't come back' ever since he rubbed up against the picture of Kylie Minogue in the Daily Star 22nd November issue. He thinks he might have Australian ancestors. Father Christmas WILL get out of the dung cart if the supply of 'Oust' arrives in time. Flossie has made some unusual sausage rolls based on the Ann Summers 1997 catalogue (page 56)..you will be AMAZED
TOOTLE *
* Who once performed in the school production '*****, ***** will you have a sausage' (1956 actually) |
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 17/12/2007 : 22:33:12
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I'm free too for the free do.
I fancied abit of dirty dancin' so I'm sorry that Pen and Walter will not be performing Up Where We Belong.
Anyhow I'll have to dance to Underneath the Arches by the looks of it.
I could always dirty dance with Santa after he's been in the muck all day. Its been so long since the Reliant came on a little trip, does anyone want a lift by the way
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 22/12/2007 : 23:39:15
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Well the party went with a real swing--Walter brought the one from the local park and hung it from the Village Hall light.
Everything was hunkie dorrie til Pen got carried away and swung just that bit too enthusiastically and brought the house down--or rather the lights and half the ceiling.
Walter's boomerang took off into Farmer Corblimy's field and was never seen again.
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 24/12/2007 : 08:22:33
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I know it's a bit late to report on the party, but we've been out searching for Walter's boomerang since Saturday night. It turned up in the milking shed of Brookfield Farm. It may never have been found if the milking had been done properly  Anyway this years event turned out to be a great success, despite the ceiling coming down (due to guests getting carried away). The rubble actually won first prize in the Vale of the White Horse competition for the most unusual Christmas display in the small village category. We won £50 in Oxfam vouchers, which will be put to good use when the sale starts on Thursday. Flossie got a special award for her sausage rolls, and the dung cart was wiped out....of gifts. We have now settled down to enjoy our Christmas, starting with Midnight Mass tonight at 11pm (the church clock needs repairing), followed by mulled wine and mince pies on the green at 12.30am. At 9 tomorrow morning there will be a 'Village Fun Run' and 'Tinsel weaving' which should take us through to lunchtime. We gather to watch The Queen in Flossie's front room before we have 'community singing' where the whole village take turns in singing a line from 'Bohemian Rhapsody' and then all join together for 'The Frogs Chorus'. IT IS SUCH AN EXCITING DAY HERE After Christmas, the full programme for days out will resume.
TOOTLE |
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Carole R.
Higher and Higher
    

United Kingdom
12869 Posts |
Posted - 24/12/2007 : 09:38:21
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PEN... on the verge... of hysterics.xxx |
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Littlebylittle
Wishing And Hoping

United Kingdom
449 Posts |
Posted - 26/12/2007 : 00:02:25
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Sorry to butt in Mother, but I just want to say, can we go to Texas. I can drive. What car should we hire?
We need to sing the song entitled, All My Ex's Live in Texas |
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 26/12/2007 : 10:57:31
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Are you Thelma or Louise, Nicky--or just drunk   
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 26/12/2007 : 11:13:13
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quote: Originally posted by Littlebylittle
Sorry to butt in Mother, but I just want to say, can we go to Texas. I can drive. What car should we hire?
We need to sing the song entitled, All My Ex's Live in Texas
Well - THAT'S A THOUGHT! Apart from our day trip to France we have never been abroad. It will take some planning, and there could be all sorts of pitfalls if we're not careful - would customs think we are a group of international terrorists? - has Pen got a passport photo later than 1957? - do they have sprouts in Texas?...or chainsaws for that matter? Would suncream be needed in January? I'll look it up in a book and get back to ya'all
TOOTLE
TOOTLE INTERNATIONAL TOURS inc |
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Carole R.
Higher and Higher
    

United Kingdom
12869 Posts |
Posted - 26/12/2007 : 13:42:00
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There is absolutely no chance of getting 'Yours Truly' up and down Route 66 in a Reliant Robin.
I will go, on the understanding that I'm transported in a 'Pink Cadillac'...Nothing less will do. 
Get back to us when you've read 'The Rough Guide To Texas And Surrounding Areas' in full, Toots.
We can't go at this, half cocked.  
Yours Truly, PEN.xx
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 26/12/2007 : 18:48:20
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I'm warming to the idea of Texas--hot deserts and cacti.
We could join the Texas Rangers
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 29/12/2007 : 20:44:58
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I've read 'The rough guide to Texas and surrounding areas' as suggested, and it's er.....rough! I'm not sure us of a delicate nature could cope with all the big hats, oil wells and pricks that are there...on the cacti ! I think we need to 'build up' for a trip like this, so with that in mind I've arranged a trip to an American Air Base in Norfolk (England - not Virginia), so we can get the 'feel' of the USA but without the need to go through passport control and a certain amount of frigging. We might however be required to eat hamburgers and possibly chew some Wrigleys. So next Saturday we are off to Lakenheath by s-t-r-e-c-t-h limo (known in Norfolk by Nor folks as a bus ) We can exchange our English money for dollars Hockwold cum Wilton post office on the way.
TOOTLE  TOOTLE USA IN THE UK TOURS 2008 |
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Carole R.
Higher and Higher
    

United Kingdom
12869 Posts |
Posted - 29/12/2007 : 22:28:42
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So its to be a kind of 'rehearsal' for the 'Real Thing' Toots?..
We DO have somewhere called 'TGI Fridays' in my neck of the woods.
Its a copy of an American Diner, but without the American aspect.
I mean, Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pudding and Lancashire Hotpot aint even been heard of in Texas...has it??
I'll have you know that everytime I've been thru passport control this year,I've been frisked .... In fact I'm beginning to think that I am an International Terrorist... 
Anyway back to American Bases:
I am well 'up for it' as they say.
Is there a dress code?...
Have you got to dress up like a GI, Toots?
Will we bop to Glen Miller Music?
Shall I wear my bobby socks?..
At the moment, there are more questions than answers.
I'm sooooooo excited.
PEN xx |
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 29/12/2007 : 22:46:31
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Trash, sidewalk, downtown--just getting into the lingo--
Gee I'm lookin forward to this.
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 17/01/2008 : 11:05:19
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The trip to Lakenheath proved a bit of a washout. Just three members turned up, and the Americans were not impressed. We had a shake and some fries in the diner, and bought a few things in the gift shop (gum, cookies , more gum and a packet of maple syrup pancake mix) and headed home early
NOT TO BE PUT OFF!......I have arranged a late minute trip on Saturday to The House of Commons in London, where we can see the place where all major decisions are made (when The White House is closed ), and also use the tea machine.
TOOTLE |
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Carole R.
Higher and Higher
    

United Kingdom
12869 Posts |
Posted - 17/01/2008 : 23:17:00
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Well I can't wait for this one.
The trip to the House Of Commons should be a hoot!..
I'm sure to get frisked on walking in there, as I am on every plane trip I ever take.
So, thats one good reason to go... 
I'm also saving up any rotten tomatoes(vine ripened) and bad eggs (organic) to hurl at any passing MP,I may see.
....and I'm taking a copy of Bob Dylans 'Blowin In The Wind.' as my protest song...
So for me, Saturday can't come fast enough.
PEN xx |
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treking
Wasn't Born To Follow
   

United Kingdom
5454 Posts |
Posted - 18/01/2008 : 18:49:46
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I'll come if I can shout ORDER, ORDER very loudly every time anyone utters a word.
I would also like Black Rods stick thingy to bang on the door before they let us in.
Thank you
Trek
Also known as Carole. |
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Brian
Something Special
 

United Kingdom
1773 Posts |
Posted - 21/01/2008 : 11:06:28
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The House of Commons trip proved very successful and quite an eye opener. We saw several MP's, and at least 40% of them were awake From memory I can remember Alistair Darling (white hair and BLACK eyebrows ), Boris Johnson (who had cycle clips on) and a cut out of Gordon Brown (who had gone for a chinese). Trek stroked Black Rods 'rod' which was a bit embarrasing as 'Mrs Rod' was there. Lady PEN made a big thing about going into The House of Commons'...I think shouting 'I'm a laidee' and 'Get me to the Lords' wasn't called for, but nobody took a vote. We sampled the tea machine, which wasn't anything special - except the prices!...I mean 2p for tea is a scandal There was a 'message' in the gents loo which I won't repeat, except to observe 'Why was Harriet in there in the first place'?? There were several other messages - but their private lives are private I suppose. Anyway at 3pm we took a vote to increase pensions by 600% which was defeated 312 - 3. The vote to go home was clear cut (like some of the MP's). We now have a good idea of what our poor MP's have to put up with
TOOTLE |
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